Hmm… a post that's not about biking, horses, or random stuff on Craigslist!

Lately I've been feeling really frustrated… mentally/socially/work-wise/etc. I feel like my life has stalled, and I'm going nowhere. My motto is, "Do what's right, not what's easy." In essence, I try my damnedest to be a good person. It seems that whatever I do, it's never enough, and I end up disappointed.

I'm not trying to be negative, but I'm really frustrated. I try to reach out to help and make other peoples' lives better. Whether it be holding the elevator door so the elderly woman shuffling toward it won't have to wait 10 minutes for it to return, or just giving up my entire weekend to sit out in the sun and volunteer at a horse event… I don't mind. If I see trash on the ground, I pick it up and throw it out. Simple stuff like that. I enjoy feeling like I've made a difference somewhere, somehow.

"Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible." -Dalai Lama

But at the same time, I'm disheartened because when I try to reach out and be friendly to someone/make new friends, I get nothing in return. No acknowledgment, no consideration, merely a brushoff because really, who needs to be friends with a slightly dorky (albeit caring and genuine) person? I'm a nice person, but I will finish last. (Probably because I was too busy helping everyone else who's fallen down, needed their photo taken at the last mile marker, etc. ) Then I wonder where everyone went, and why I wasn't invited.

I want to be successful, I want good things to happen to me, I want to be happy.

I'm just trying to be a better person. My name is Kendall.

*Yes, I borrow that phrase from Earl.